Look. It's understandable that you took the wrong jacket. It was dark, they were all black, there was an open bar, whatever. It's less understandable that you didn't notice the entire walk/subway ride back. It's even less understandable that you didn't notice for the entire following DAY AND A HALF. There are probably thirty missed calls/text messages demanding the hostage release. You know who I am. If you had a soul, you would give my shit back.
Love,
Vanessa
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